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Wisecrack

by Haley Blais

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  • Record/Vinyl + Digital Album

    Standard jacket, Printed Inner Sleeve, Black Vinyl

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    ships out within 7 days
    Purchasable with gift card

      $37 CAD or more 

     

1.
Lyrics Verse 1 I’d kill to be a sensitive person But my heart, it beats too closely to the blade And if I pierce it (and I’ve come close), I’d just pour salt into the wound Because I hate the sweetness of the blood Chorus And the only mercy that I give is for the bugs (repeated a lot) *various chanting and squealing* I feel the ground in my face And the sun in my feet And the wind in my mouth as I speak
2.
Lyrics Verse 1 God, what a mess I must seem in the back of a theatre The scene where the dog has to die I’m upset, but at best, keep your hands off my chest Can’t a girl mourn the death of a dog in the back of a theatre in Peace? Verse 2 The carpet left marks on our face I remember the sun was still out as if nothing had changed I could see through the window at minimal height No obstructions at all, just the pure virgin light Chorus Can’t a girl mourn the death of her dog in the back of a theatre in Peace, anymore? X2 Verse 3 I never wanted the space I can picture the cause of the clearing and the look on your face You can fool me once and I’ll actually believe you If you fool me twice I’m like putty in your hands Bridge Just like a lamb, I’ll trust you in the still heat Sucking the finger of the butcher who’ll kill me x2 All that I am All that you are Call me a liar, I’ve heard in before Call me a cab All the blood spilled In the car, it’s survivor’s guilt
3.
Lyrics Verse 1 Crying in the backseat of your parent’s car, You said that you don’t have a curfew anymore 23 and trying to keep your life from going sour And your mother’s getting married in the fall Verse 2 And you know that she is happy, that things will be okay But you wonder what will happen christmas day And I don’t know what to tell you, to make you not feel bad So I offer my condolences to dad Verse 3 Am I just a hypocrite, or is there something wrong with it? I want my therapist to think I’m cool I call you from the office phone to ask you to come drive me home Okay, I’m just a liar I never went Chorus But if you see me out Know I’m the coolest fucking bitch in town You wanna drink a drink that’s watered down? It’ll just take you longer Verse 3 Can I be responsible for things that I did years ago? I guess it could be good for just a laugh Is it just a privileged thought, I asked you once but I forgot I’m not the only one whose split in Half Chorus But if you see me out Know I’m the coolest fucking bitch in town You wanna drink a drink that’s watered down? It’ll just take you longer Coolest fucking bitch in town x5
4.
Reset button 03:12
Lyrics Verse 1 Going back to normal You wear your dress at winter formal Would you go back and do it over again? Put my hands above the table I’m afraid that I’m not able to hit the reset button after I have Gone Hit the reset button after I have gone Verse 2 I’m not scared of taking chances I think failure is romantic If you forget, or just don’t care Chorus Hit the reset button after I have gone x3 Verse 3 Can we keep the candle burning? There’s a sense in reassuring I don’t have to do it over again You say that I am a good person But my condition, it may worsen So hit the reset button after I have gone Chorus Hit the reset button after I have gone x4
5.
Matchmaker 03:47
Lyrics Verse 1 I could be happy I could be still I could give all of myself, never have to think twice if you will Something about me: I like stability Though I can’t fear your god, I’m finding it easy to get on my knees Chorus And I read somewhere on the internet That if we have kids then they won’t exist And then I’m the bitch who ruined your family line It’s nobody’s fault though But somebody’s pissed And the boys in the back are shaking their fists You don’t have your permit, I think that I’m too drunk to drive Verse 2 A holiday memory comes back to me now The smell of a foodcourt, my shoes are untied And I’m lost in a crowd What’s in a person If we’re nothing but dust? I’m holding my hand to my mouth but I can’t keep you out of my Lungs Chorus And I read somewhere on the internet That if we have kids then they won’t exist And then I’m the bitch who ruined your family line It’s nobody’s fault though But somebody’s pissed And the boys in the back are shaking their fists You don’t have your permit, I think that I’m too drunk to drive
6.
Concrete 03:09
Lyrics Verse 1 If there was cement being poured in the place where we live I think I would have written my name in it Pushing my fingers around in the wet sand It made me feel good so I’d put my whole face in it Pre-chorus Carefully not to get in inside my mouth But still leaving a piece of my skin in the stone And you help me to wipe it off Pushing your fingers around in the wet Chorus All the things I do Are just probably you Verse 2 Never too sure if my words are sincere Or just acting in place of the ones that I fear I’m and empath, the first time I ever lied You were crying to me, I was old in your eyes Pre-chorus Carry me, haul my weight up every flight Scream at me once so you know what it’s like In the concrete everything’s immortalized Scream at me once so you know what it’s like Chorus All the things I do Are just probably you
7.
The Cabin 03:57
Lyrics Verse 1 Never said that it was funny But I’m laughing anyway Instead of holding on I dropped the rope into the lake I’m drowning Verse 2 Never said that it was easy But we’re cruising anyway This boat is going faster than my eyes can even say I’m flying Verse 3 If it’s just a hesitation Will we ever see that place A beer soaked memory - who gave me beer in seventh grade? Mom’s spying Chorus Why is it so hard to get up on the board? I’ll sleep in the hot room ‘till they call me for more Post chorus/outro I don’t wanna be the smoke inside the living room Can we open up the patio door? I don’t wanna be the wet inside your swimming shoes Can you take me out and shake me on shore? I don’t wanna be the smoke inside the living room Can we open up the patio door? I don’t wanna be the wet inside your swimming shoes Can you take me out and shake me on shore? I don’t wanna be the smoke inside the living room Can we open up the patio door? I don’t wanna be the wet inside your swimming shoes
8.
Baby Teeth 03:34
Lyrics Verse 1 Got a friend out in los angeles Smoke breaks out in the car I used to think that I could live there Be the next big fucking star But when I smoke I don’t get paranoid I go full metal jacket When I die I know I won’t freak out until I’m in the casket Chorus I want my baby teeth back Stare in the mirror do my best “late night show” wisecrack I wanna know what it’s like Pull out my front one on my own time Verse 2 Can I tell you a secret? Don’t know what the hell I’m thinking All of my tight lipped opinions happened while I was asleep And when you ask me to diffuse the bomb I’ll tell you I deployed it It’s so hard to keep a family I guess I just destroyed it Chorus I want my baby teeth back Stare in the mirror do my best “late night show” wisecrack I wanna know what it’s like Pull out my front one on my own time Bridge And come to find I’m the one cog in the machine that won’t grind But if the machine is fine Can’t help but take it as some kind of sign Chorus I want my baby teeth back x2 (c’mon) I want my baby teeth back Stare in the mirror do my best “late night show” wisecrack I wanna know what it’s like Pull out my front one on my own time When I die I know I won’t freak out x5 When I die I won’t freak out
9.
Body 05:18
Lyrics Verse 1 I deserve this, it’s not absurd I am the hardest person I can care for And I know that it’s just a body count But the body keeps the score Verse 2 Put a picture of a smile of a sill Just to know what I’m looking at Caught a glimpse of each other on the hill What feels forever can happen fast Chorus But don’t ask me any questions about all the things I’ve done x2 Cause nothing’s ever changing Verse 2 All night talking about how we think we’ll go Man this whole year feels like hell Stuck forever in a reboot of your favourite teenage television Show Chorus But don’t ask me any questions about all the things I’ve done x3 Cause nothing’s ever changing x2 Instrumental
10.
Winner 04:05
Lyrics Verse 1 Jenny’s got it down in texas Goddamn battle of the sexes My songs will make sense in 30 years Verse 2 The rocks we eat are getting softer Someone call a doctor I’m getting thinner Chorus But you always hold me close and whisper x3 “baby you’re a winner” Verse 3 My heart is trying to touch you so my hands don’t have a use Anymore Education’s everybody’s business and you have the highest score Verse 4 All I wanna do is drink around you you’re so boring But I don’t really wanna feel like shit in the morning Chorus But you always hold me close and whisper x3 “baby you’re a winner” Repeat x2
11.
Lyrics Verse 1 Came out late, and black and blue Do unto others as you would do Unto brother’s father’s scale And sister lifting up the veil Verse 2 Just trying to do the best I can Still on our parent’s cell phone plan You’re outside on our favorite street Beginner’s guide to birdwatching Chorus One minute she wasn’t there, And then the next minute there she was (repeat a lot) Bees

about

Wisecrack is the sophomore album from Vancouver-based singer-songwriter Haley Blais. Conceived as a conceptual record about the formation of new families amidst the dissolution of her parents’ relationship, Wisecrack is textured and wryly poetic, oscillating somewhere between cherished childhood memories and the creation of a new self. The existential, everyday worries we all contain but rarely share are laid bare across eleven songs exquisitely performed with profundity, grace, and humour. Tongue-in-cheek lines like I want my therapist to think I’m cool give the melancholic mood a biting edge. Can I be responsible for things that I did years ago? / I guess it could be good for just a laugh, Blais sings — that’s Wisecrack in a nutshell. Funny and raw at the same time.

Blais developed a community and fanbase as a teenager almost a decade ago with her diaristic YouTube videos and tender ukulele covers. Since then, Blais, who sang classical opera for ten years, traded in the solo ukulele for a guitar and a five-piece band. In 2020, Blais released a debut full-length album of jangly pop anthems, Below the Salt, produced with indie staples Tennis and Louise Burns. The debut amassed millions of streams and avid support from publications like NPR, NYLON, and i-D and led to a North American tour with Peach Pit. Now signed to iconic indie label Arts & Crafts, Blais is set to release Wisecrack in the fall of 2023.

credits

released September 15, 2023

Produced by David Vertesi & Jonathan Anderson
Recorded at Protection Island Studio in Maple Ridge, BC
Engineered by Jonathan Anderson
Additional engineering by David Vertesi

All songs mixed by Jonathan Anderson
All songs mastered by Philip Shaw Bova


PERFORMERS:

Haley Blais - Vocals, acoustic guitar, Wurlitzer, percussion, bells, bass organ, string programming on Beginner’s Guide To Birdwatching

David Vertesi - acoustic/electric guitar, bass, piano/keyboards, organ, synths, drums (track 1), percussion, hammered dulcimer, vocals, dobro, horn arrangements

Jonathan Anderson - electric/acoustic guitar, bass, slide guitar, pedal steel, banjo, dobro, piano/keyboards

Johnny Andrews - Drums (except track 1)
Malcolm Aiken - Trumpet, French Horn, Trombone (2, 3)
Elisa Thorn - Harp (6)

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Haley Blais Vancouver, British Columbia

person of zero substance.

physical merch at tiny-kingdom-music.myshopify.com

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